Every year as we approach Rosh Hashanah I think about my Mom more than ever. My Mom passed away 12/12/12 so it will be 10 years in December, and somehow it still feels like yesterday. I was at a dinner party this week and the woman next to me remembered the outfit my Mom wore to her grandma’s funeral a short time before my Mom died; she was describing the purple cashmere button down cardigan, pleated khaki skirt, Mary Jane shoes. At the market this week, the cashier was reminiscing about my mom doing her holiday shopping. On a walk yesterday, I bumped into a woman who shared how much she loved seeing my mom at the market before the holidays and getting quick recipe ideas casually in the produce aisle. Every one of these 3 women who I chanced to bump into this week initiated the conversation about memories of my Mom and each one finished their memory calling my Mom a “Regal Queen.”
My Mom was sweet and humble. She didn’t work outside the home but she was such a hard worker. She loved to cook, garden, take care of her home, be scrupulously honest, and most of all to do sweet, kind things for other people. She loved the outdoors, especially the pool and the ocean. She loved religion and spirituality. She believed very firmly that kind good people come out ahead. My Mom was a really good woman with really good values. I wish I could share with my Mom how much she’s still missed 10 years after she’s gone.
As I get older, I remember my experiences of my Mom at the age I am now, and I connect to and relate to her experiences much more than I did as they happened when I was too young to understand. When I was a young newlywed girl, my mom’s grief at our new life stages wasn’t relatable; I’m the Mom adjusting to the new life stage now and while I feel all the feelings, I finally know and understand exactly how my Mom felt.
When I worked at Sheppard Mullin Richter and Hampton almost twenty years ago, one day during lunch with a bunch of young women lawyers, a conversation started about Moms. Each woman sitting in that circle of young bright accomplished women shared that they had an awesome Mom who loved them with all their heart and soul and the daughters attributed their drive and success to their Moms and the extraordinary love their moms had for them.
As I think about Rosh Hashanah and goals/dreams for the New Year, I think of my Mom and her values…humility, kindness, honesty, hard work, overwhelming love, pride in her community, sharing, respect for people. My dream is to emulate my Mom and to live in her footsteps.
Wishing everyone a sweet, healthy, happy New Year filled with so much blessing!